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The Language of S.L.A.A. Recovery
Excerpt from the Welcome Pamphlet
©1997 The Augustine Fellowship, Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, Fellowship-Wide Services, Inc. All rights reserved.
The complete pamphlet can be purchased at http://store.slaafws.org/prod/PAM-009.html
Many different terms are used during S.L.A.A. meetings. While many terms are used differently in various S.L.A.A. Groups, we will attempt to define a few of these terms as commonly used in S.L.A.A.
|Abstinence||A change in our behavior that involves stopping the addictive pattern - one day, sometimes one minute, at a time. Abstinence is a beginning point in sobriety.|
|Acting Out ||To engage in addictive behavior. Engaging in a behavior which is one's bottom line, is often referred to as having a slip.|
|Anorexia||The compulsive avoidance of giving or receiving social, sexual, or emotional nourishment.|
|Bottom-Line Behaviors ||Generally, self-defined activities which we refrain from in order to experience our physical, mental, emotional, sexual, and spiritual wholeness.|
|Boundaries ||Self-defined, self-protective limits we use for interaction with persons, places, things, or activities.|
|Cross-talk ||Sometimes known as "feedback". To respond directly or indirectly to what someone who shared in a meeting; for example, to offer someone answers to his or her problems, or to engage in dialogue during the meeting.|
|Group Conscience||A process of decision-making by the group. S.L.A.A. encourages all members to express their views.|
|Inventory or "Moral" Inventory||A list of qualities within a person, both positive and negative, discovered through self-examination. Also to take someone else's inventory: to judge another person's life or sobriety. |
|Isolation||To withdraw from the help and healing process of others, program support, or our Higher Power. Isolation often leads to or accompanies a slip. Isolation may also be a form of acting out for anorectic members.|
|S.L.A.A. Member||Any S.L.A.A. participant who has a desire to stop living out a pattern of sex and love addiction.|
|Sobriety ||Initially, a state of abstinence from addictive bottom-line behaviors; often accompanied by the return of sanity, choice, and personal dignity that comes from abstaining from bottom-line behaviors.|
|Sobriety Date||Generally, the date we stop engaging in our bottom-line behaviors.|
|Sponsor ||A person who works closely with another member to provide individual support and guidance in applying the S.L.A.A. Twelve Step/Twelve Tradition program. A sponsor should be a person we are not in danger of acting out with, nor are likely to find intrigue with.|
|Trigger||A person, place, thing, or environment that sets off an urge to act out.|
|Withdrawal||The physical, mental, emotional, and often spiritual upheaval which generally accompanies the break in our addictive pattern.|
|13th-Stepping||Manipulating another person in recovery, especially a newcomer, into a sexual, emotional, or romantic relationship.|
|Open or Closed Meeting?||S.L.A.A. members highly value our tradition of anonymity. Group conscience determines whether a meeting shall be open or closed. In general, the following guidelines are used:|
|Open Meeting A meeting open to anyone who wants to find out more about recovery from sex and love addiction.|
|Closed Meeting A meeting open only to those having a desire to stop living out a pattern of sex and love addiction.|