The S.L.A.A. Fellowship-Wide Services, Inc. 2003 Annual Business Meeting Tuesday, July 8-Friday, July 11, 2003 Holiday Day Inn, Dedham, MA Minutes Conference Theme: The 1st Tradition of S.L.A.A.: "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon S.L.A.A. unity." Present were 47 voting members that included nine members of the Board of Trustees (from the USA and Rome, Italy), the Journal Editor, the F.W.S. Executive Director, F.W.S. staff members, and delegates from the USA, Canada, Brazil, and Germany. Also in attendance were observers and several volunteers from the New England Intergroup. The F.W.S. Office, Board Committees, and most Conference Committees submitted 2002-2003 annual reports to the ABM. The following list of reports appeared in the participants' Welcome packets: * Fellowship-Wide Services Office (budget, staffing, credit card, long distance sponsorship, the Journal) * Board of Trustees Final Report * Board Ad Hoc Literature Committee * Board Conference and Convention Committee * Board Human Resources Committee * Board Internet Committee * Board Literature Committee * Board Newsletter Committee * Board Nominating Committee * Office Operating Committee * Board Policy Committee * Board Public Information Committee * Board Steps and Traditions Committee * Conference By-Laws Committee * Conference Diversity Committee * Conference Finance Committee * Conference Healthy Relationships Committee * Conference Interfellowship Committee * Conference Members Retention Committee * Conference Steps and Traditions Committee * Conference Anorexia Committee * Conference Charter Committee * Prison Outreach Committee Frequently Used Abbreviations: BMIS: Business Meeting Items Summary BOT: Board of Trustees CCC: Conference Charter Committee CSM: Conference Service Manual HP: Higher Power General Assembly- Tuesday, July 8, 2003, 1:00-4:40pm The General Assembly began with a moment of silence for the still suffering sex and love addict and the Serenity Prayer. Marcella M., (BOT chair and micro), Robin S. (CCC co-chair and macro, and Deb W. (back-up) facilitated this session. Andrew H. was the record keeper. The room seating configuration was a circle. There was an introduction of this year's conference theme, the 1st Tradition of S.L.A.A. All participants present introduced themselves. The colored ribbons attached to each name tag were explained as were the resources available to the participants. The process of the General Assembly was explained. This included: Items to bring to each General Assembly (BMIS, Revised CSM, Additions to the BMIS, Handout for Phase II, Higher Power); Confirmation of the quorum and the importance of attendance at each session; Purpose and use of the microphone; Explanation of roles and facilitation of the ABM (micro, macro, back-up) and other assigned roles (spiritual reminder, timekeeper, vote counters, record keeper); Use and Purpose of 30 or 60 seconds of silence; and the concept of HP and group conscience. The Interactive Method of Community Problem Solving was explained, specifically Phase I and Phase II, and modified Roberts Rules of Order as the voting method. A review of the schedule was completed. Volunteers were asked to serve as facilitators in the morning meditation and getting current meetings. In addition to doing the business of the fellowship, participants were reminded of two other most important duties, to elect three new BOT members and to continue their participation throughout the year by joining conference committees. The three nominees were identified and participants were directed to read their bios in the packets. Participants were also directed to their CSM for a list and description of conference committees. After a short break, Board and Conference Committees reported to the conference. Most committees referred to their annual reports submitted and listed above. The Conference Literature Committee reported on several projects in the process of development, two of which were on the agenda. The Conference Service Committee, the Conference Sponsorship Committee, the Members Relationship to Trustees, the Conference Journal Committee, and the Conference Internet Committee were noted as inactive. The Phase II process change was reviewed. It was stated the all Issues for Discussion and Brainstorming Items would be handled as IFDs (Items for Discussion). A time limit, set by the facilitator of the session, would be determined, members would be given an allotted amount of time to speak to the item, and once the allotted time is spent, the item would be closed. The minutes would capture the comments for future reference. The participants were also directed to read the column for comments made by the referred committees and to the Motions Index of the CSM for other references. The participants were reminded of the 7:00pm deadline for new motions to agenda. The session was adjourned after announcements to an hour session, "Getting to Know the BOT/F.W.S. Office staff," and dinner. General Assembly Reconvenes, July 8, 2003, 7:00-8:15pm The General Assembly opened with readings of the 12 Steps and the 12 Traditions. Andrew H. served as the micro, Diana L. as the macro, and Judith W. as the back-up. Deb W. served as the record keeper, Jack S. the spiritual reminder, Rob H. the timekeeper, and Judy J. and Ron P. the vote counters. The quorum was met. A brief explanation of Phase I was reviewed. The results of Phase I are as follows: 03o01/98-18 Motion: That the ABM approve as Conference Approved Literature the attached rewrite of Chapter 4 from our Basic Text and the Anorexia pamphlet, for publication as a separate booklet. Tabled by CLC originator of the motion, Phase II 03o02/98-20 Motion: Change the by-laws, Article 5, Section 4 and Section 6 to read (attachment #3)as attached. BOT, BLC, CCC committees reported on this issue. Tabled Phase II 03o03/99-06 Motion: To add the following key words (noted in bold italics) to the list of major resources in the Preamble and order list of resources as follows: 1) Sobriety. Our willingness to stop acting our in our own personal bottom-line addictive behavior on a daily basis. 2) Sponsorship/Meetings. Our capacity to reach out for the supportive fellowship within S.L.A.A. 3) Steps. Our practice of the Twelve Step program of recovery to achieve sexual and emotional sobriety. 4) Service. Our giving back to the S.L.A.A. community what we continue to freely receive. 5) Spirituality. Our developing a relationship with a Power greater than ourselves which can guide and sustain us in recovery. The vote: 40/2/5. The minority can live with it. This motion passes. 03o04/00-01 Motion: Extend official conference approved invitation from the IFC to other "S" fellowships to attend and observe SLAA's 2000 ABM. Tabled to Phase II 03o04/00-01A Issue for Discussion: Shall SLAA extend an official (Conference approved) invitation from the IFC to other "S" fellowships to attend and observe an SLAA ABM in the future? 03o05/00-02 Motion: Permit invited observers from other "S" fellowships to voice opinions/make public statements on any proceeding at the S.L.A.A.'s 2000 ABM. Invited observers from other "S" fellowships are not authorize to vote on any motions at the Committee or General Assembly levels. Tabled to Phase II 03o05/00-02A Motion to Amend: Replace all wording of Motion in Item 03o05/00-01 with the following text: Issue for Discussion, Recommendation Required: ABM observers are typically permitted to speak in General Assembly but not to vote. Observers are also permitted to attend and speak in Conference Committee meetings. Shall an observer from another "S" fellowship be permitted to speak in S.L.A.A.'s ABM General Assembly and Conference Committee meetings? If so, what would be the nature of such speaking: commentary, responses to questions, etc.? Tabled to Phase II 03o06/00-03 Motion: List on the official SLAA website and in the FWS World Directory the official telephone numbers and URLs of other S fellowship. Add a disclaimer on the SLAA website and in the FWS World Directory (with it's next printing) noting SLAA neither endorses nor recommends the following organization, their sites and the central office phone numbers are identifies only to provide individual with the opportunity to learn about other 12-Step, 12-Tradition recovery groups dealing with other 12-Step, 12 Tradition recovery groups dealing with addiction to sex, love and relationships. Tabled to Phase II 03o07/00-04 IFD: The IFC would like to gain knowledge of what individual groups, intergroups, conference committees, F.W.S. or the BOT are doing in terms of Outreach. A major portion of the 1999 Interfellowship Forum discussion centered on Outreach to prisons, clergy, mental health professionals, judges, probation officers, etc. 03o08/00-05 IFD: What do different groups do if someone in a meeting discloses he/she has broken the law? Examples: He/she has...molested a child, had sex with a minor, bought or sold Kiddie porn, had sex with a prostitute, had raped someone, bought or sold drugs, battered someone, etc. 03o09/00-07 IFD: When Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous is abbreviated in legal document and conference approved literature as S.L.A.A., a consistent punctuation occurs. 03o10/00-09 Motion: The By-laws be changes for Article VI, Sections 2 to reread as attached. The vote: 43/0/4. The minority can live with it. The motion passes. 03o11/00-10 IFD: There are many of us who are in both S.L.A.A. and Co-S.L.A.A. who consider that our Co-addiction is indistinguishable from out addiction, the focus is just different as it is with many special interest meetings. Therefore, please discuss: that S.L.A.A. as consider Co-S.L.A.A. as an integral part of the sex and love addiction and another part of S.L.A.A. similar to "Anorexia"; that FWS be a resource for Co-S.L.A.A. as well as a place where co-groups can accumulate resources; that at the very least, Co-S.L.A.A. be invited/a part of the Interfellowship Committee. 03o12/01-01 IFD: Each committee have a board liaison to report any progress to. 03o13/01-02 IFD: FWS office workers who are not members of fellowship should not attend ABC/M. 03o14/01-05 Motion: Approve the [Crosstalk, Feedback, & Triggering Language] pamphlet. Tabled to Phase II 03o15/01-06 Motion: Approve the [After-Slip Worksheet] pamphlet. Tabled to Phase II 03o16/01-08 Motion: Change the sentence in second paragraph of Page 259 of the S.L.A.A. Basic Text from "...I swore revenge and tried to humiliate him by accepting as a sex partner every black man who called me..." to "...I swore revenge and tried to humiliate him by accepting as a sex partner every man..." Withdrawn by the originator 03o17/01-10 IFD: Recognizing that identification of a higher power is a sensitive issue for many, how can we best serve the needs of the addict who still suffers and has great resistance to the word "God?" Use "Higher Power," "God/Higher Power," "God" interchangeably and equitably in our literature? Create literature geared specifically to the agnostic or atheist? Other suggestions? 03o18/01-11 Motion: Create a fast-track for a completed literature title to be addressed by the Conference. After the CLC produces its final draft, let them submit it to the CCC for placement at the top of the next ABM agenda, or for decision-making between ABMs. Tabled to Phase II 03o19/02-01 Motion: Add "Thy will, not mine, be done." to the end of the Serenity Prayer, wherever it appears in conference approved literature, if it does not already exist. Tabled to Phase II 03o20/02-02 Motion: Have two versions of the basic text. One anonymous-one not. BOT will create a version of the basic text (S.L.A.A.) that does not draw attention to itself; remove colors and page/chapter header from this version only. Perhaps let this replace the 2001 brightly colored embossed version. Tabled to Phase II 03o21/02-03 IFD: Suggest that an "Issue for Discussion" at ABMs be handled in a significantly different manner from "Brainstorming Items" in order for the delegates who so desire to be given a 1, 2, or 3 minute turn (at the discretion of the chair) to "discuss" an issue in the style most often use d in their Intergroups and home group business meetings. 03o22/02-04 Motion: Add to future publication of the S.L.A.A. Basic Text and all pamphlets a SL.A.A. recovery term index (see 25th Anniversary bookmark). Until this can happen, include index insert with book orders. On pamphlets only include reference items that pertain to that pamphlet. Tabled to Phase II 03o23/02-05 Motion: Subject to adequate FWS resources for any given ABM, fund the travel cost of 2 international delegates from different points outside North America (U.S.A., Mexico and Canada). Other conference fees to be raised by the delegate's region. Delegates funded like this will not participate in the TEF (Travel Equalization Fund). Recipient delegates defined jointly by conference and FWS. Tabled to Phase II 03o24/02-11 Motion: Include in the ABM business process the Prioritization of Business Items instead of only considering items by order of submission date. Tabled to Phase II 03o25/02-12 Motion: Limit the number of Issues for Discussion in any one year or limit the overall total time for discussions so more motions can be addressed. For example, have 1 day of discussion items which equal 5 hours, or have 5 discussion items lasting 1 hour each. Tabled to 2004 03o26/02-13 Motion: Make the BMIS available in electronic format. Tabled to Phase II 03o27/02-14 Motion: Create 2 more BOT positions (for a total of 11) to serve the fellowship. Tabled to Phase II 03o28/02-15 IFD: I understand there is redesign of medallions for 12 steps and a consideration to change medallion makers for chips (a new forge). To broaden the scope of acceptance, rather than imprint S.L.A.A. on the obverse, print "Augustine Fellowship" or "The Augustine Fellowship." 03o29/02-16 Motion: F.W.S. officially acknowledge the need for, and support and encourage privacy in its electronic mail communications, and adopt PGP (Pretty Good Privacy) freeware to support this. Tabled to Phase II No Number Motion: The 2003 Conference confirms the Conference Public Information Committee retroactively in full capacity to the close of the 2002 ABM, including financial aspects as reported in the committee reports. A vote was taken, 45/0/2. The motion passed. No Number Motion: The 2003 Conference confirms the Conference Intergroup Communication Committee retroactively in full capacity to the close of the 2002 ABM, including financial aspects as reported in the committee reports. A vote was taken, 44/0/3. The motion passed. The session was adjourned after announcements to two taped sessions, a Speaker Panel on the 1st Tradition of S.L.A.A. and a dialogue, lead by Sarah A. and Judith W., on special interest groups. General Assembly, June 9, 2003, 8:30-12noon This session opened with the Serenity Prayer, readings of the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions, a reading of the new Preamble, and 2-minute check-ins. The quorum was met. Gaelen S.R. served as the micro, Rob K. as the macro, and Diana L. as the back-up. Deb W. served as the record keeper, Jack S. and Petra R-W. as the spiritual reminders, Cristina C. as the timekeeper, and Danette S. and Ron P. as the vote counters. The facilitator reported the copier was down and the three newly submitted motions were not able to be copied and dispensed to the participants. A straw poll was taken. Sixteen participants wanted the facilitator to read the new motions in their entirety in order to complete the Phase I process. Twenty-three participants wanted to have the copies before they voted in Phase I. The facilitator moved on to an explanation of the Phase II process and to the first motion. * 03o01/98-18 That the ABM approve as Conference Approved Literature the attached rewrite of Chapter 4 from our Basic Text and the Anorexia pamphlet, for publication as a separate booklet. This item was tabled by the Conference Literature Committee (CLC) until the next ABM. There was a question from the floor as to removing this item and perhaps its "placeholder" status on the agenda. It was determined there was no precedent to remove a piece of literature due to age. There was a motion made from the floor by Rhea O. Remove the rewrite of Chapter 4 of our Basic Text and the Anorexia pamphlet from the BMIS until it is completed by the CLC. The motion was seconded and a discussion held. Comments are recorded and paraphrased as follows: * Better process of approving literature is needed * Get rid of this placeholder * Present literature when it is ready * Tabled because it is not ready * Business process is being streamlined as is the prioritization of items that might include the approval of literature * Fast-track literature motion may address this issue * Motions submitted should be honored * It is not appropriate to take a motion off because it has been there a long time * Discussing this item each year is a waste of time * BMIS have lots of items that are written in a way that we cannot deal with them and it is unhealthy to deal with these items * Many have worked long hours on this document * More feedback is needed A first vote was taken: 20/25/2. Minority opinion was expressed. A second vote was taken: 24/21/2... A new minority opinion was expressed. A third and final vote was taken: 21/24/2. The motion failed. There was a challenge to group conscience which was withdrawn. 03o02/98-20 Change the by-laws, Article 5, Section 4 and Section 6 to read (attachment #3) The BOT, BLC, CCC committees reported on this issue. This item was tabled by BLC and CCC (originators of the motion) until 2004. 03o04/00-01A Issue for Discussion, recommendation required: Shall SLAA extend an official conference approved invitation from the IFC to other "S" fellowships to attend and observe an S.L.A.A. ABM in the future. There was a brief review of the new Phase II process that eliminated the recommendation required status. The originator of the motion asked the conference to amend the motion. 03o04/00-01 Issue for Discussion: Extend official conference approved invitation from the IFC to other "S" fellowships to attend and observe SLAA's 2000 ABM. There was 20 minutes allotted for discussion, 14 2-minute allotments and 6 1-minute allotments. Comments were recorded and paraphrased as follows: * We do invite other "S" fellowships and speak on the floor and not vote * We gain knowledge from other "S" fellowships * This would increase awareness of sex addiction * Other "S" fellowships are looked at as outside friends * Increases the success of 5th Tradition * This is another way to help the addict * Wishes no lines were drawn between "S" fellowships * Combine "S" fellowship meeting schedules * Need S.L.A.A. unity as well as unity with "S" fellowships * Leaders can suggest we cooperate with other "S" fellowships for the 5th Tradition * Must respect anonymity of all members * Concern about the love addicts and the anorexics, if this happened we must extend the invitation to everyone and the where to we draw the line * There is no problem with any observer attending * Issue with "invitation" perceived as affiliation * If we need resources, lets go where the resources are * Opportunity to learn how to "play well" with others * S.L.A.A. needs the ABM to remain only S.L.A.A. * Danger for other "S" fellowships forgetting where we are and they may be not as focused on the steps as we are * We can learn from other "S" fellowship in other ways * Affiliation is dangerous to the organization * What did our organization learn from our attendance at other "S" fellowships * We have been invited to other "S" groups * No formal way of dealing with sending others to "S" fellowships * Affiliation with other "S" groups has been invaluable to those in the Seattle area, other "S" fellowships are a part of the same community * Anyone is welcome at any time and there is no dispute of the value that they might add, do not want to make time for motions for conference approval such as these when it can be done already * Extension of the invitation is a financial problem * Question about the objective of observations and getting the information * Excluding someone who qualifies to our fellowship is against the Traditions * Taking time out of our meeting is the focus of the next vote After the discussion time was completed, the three new motions were distributed to the participants. After a short break, the General Assembly reconvened. Deb W. spoke briefly about the qualifications to serve on the BOT and her experiences as a BOT member. Christian N. introduced the BOT election process and invited any new nominees to come forward. Phase I was completed on the three new motions. The results were as follows: 03n30/03-01: To broaden the scope of acceptance, on the redesign of medallions for 12 Steps, rather than imprint S.L.A.A. on the obverse, print "Augustine Fellowship" or "The Augustine Fellowship." This motion was tabled to Phase II. 03n31/03-02: Change the Third Step to make the words "as we understood God" italicized or bold type wherever they appear in future printing. This motion was tabled to Phase II. 03n32/03-03: That the S.L.A.A. Basic Text must be made available online free for downloading in *.pdf, *.rtf, and *.doc to facilitate the understanding of what the SLAA program is all about, rather than give people (especially people from around the world) a blank wall and a demand for money. This is to be done with the proviso that people can (of their own volition) purchase a copy of the book in hard copy from FSO or their nearest group. This motion was tabled to Phase II. 03o05/00-02: Motion: Permit invited observers from other "S" fellowships to voice opinions/make public statements on any proceeding at the S.L.A.A.'s 2000 ABM. Invited observers from other "S" fellowships are not authorized to vote on any motions at the Committee or General Assembly levels. This item was withdrawn by the originator of the motion. 03o05/00-02A: Motion to Amend: Replace all wording of Motion in Item 03o05/00-01 with the following text: Issue for Discussion, Recommendation Required: ABM observers are typically permitted to speak in General Assembly but not to vote. Observers are also permitted to attend and speak in Conference Committee meetings. Shall an observer from another "S" fellowship be permitted to speak in S.L.A.A.'s ABM General Assembly and Conference Committee meetings? If so, what would be the nature of such speaking: commentary, responses to questions, etc.? This item was withdrawn by the originator of the motion 03o06/00-03: List on the official SLAA website and in the FWS World Directory the official telephone numbers and URLs of other S fellowship. Add a disclaimer on the SLAA website and in the FWS World Directory (with it's next printing) noting SLAA neither endorses nor recommends the following organization, their sites and the central office phone numbers are identifies only to provide individual with the opportunity to learn about other 12-Step, 12-Tradition recovery groups dealing with other 12-Step, 12 Tradition recovery groups dealing with addiction to sex, love and relationships. There were no committee reports. A note was made that this is currently practiced, but are not bound by the conference to do this. The IFC withdrew this motion. 03o07/00-04: IFD: The IFC would like to gain knowledge of what individual groups, intergroups, conference committees, F.W.S. or the BOT are doing in terms of Outreach. A major portion of the 1999 Interfellowship Forum discussion centered on Outreach to prisons, clergy, mental health professionals, judges, probation officers, etc. This item was withdrawn by the originator of the motion. 03o08/00-05: IFD: What do different groups do if someone in a meeting discloses he/she has broken the law? Examples: He/she has...molested a child, had sex with a minor, bought or sold Kiddie porn, had sex with a prostitute, had raped someone, bought or sold drugs, battered someone, etc. Twenty minutes were allotted for discussion of this item, 7 2-minute comments and 6 1-minute comments. Comments were recorded and paraphrased as follows: * Members came to the BOT with concerns regarding the legal issues. After conversation with the S.L.A.A. attorney, the BOT crafted a statement, "Anonymity, the Law, and S.L.A.A." It was then distributed to all participants. * Have a phrase in the opening would ask anyone whose profession requires reporting to please raise their hands, so that individuals can see who will not report or who they can report to * Reporting device changes from state to state * There is a problem with mandated people sharing the incident * Contact own attorneys in their state * Tell people not to share this type of crime and tell sponsor, unless the sponsor is mandated to report and they can get a temporary sponsor * Do whatever the group conscience determines * This is a personal issue * We are anonymous, not confidential * We should gather to offer help to those in this situation * A mandatory reporter did not report the situation because the situation was being handled well * Some people would find that their share might trigger others * If we are going to allow this, there should be a caveat read at each meeting for the information the group regarding detailed shares * Details would be at the discretion of the sharers as will be the possible consequences * Encourage members not to share graphic behaviors * Some meetings are screened and persons are qualified before they attend the meeting * Graphic sharing breaks the boundaries of individual members in attendance * Encouragement of not sharing is also to protect the other members at the meeting * One area voiced extremes on both sides of this issue. Would like to see S.L.A.A. have a policy about this and would support reading of the consequences of sharing * As a mandatory reporter, I would like to not be put in a position where the choice might be not to attend S.L.A.A. meetings * Don't name names, places, dates and use disclaimer * Would like to face this issue * In another area, the feedback on this issue was on every aspect of a continuum 03o09/00-07: IFD: When Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous is abbreviated in legal document and conference approved literature as S.L.A.A., a consistent punctuation occurs. Fifteen minutes were allotted for this discussion. Comments were recorded and paraphrased as follows: * The Journal editor has been using S.L.A.A. with periods as consistent punctuation * Doesn't need conference approval to do so * Likes S.L.A.A. without periods, it is easier to read * Common to see S.L.A.A. without periods * Extra punctuation not necessary * F.W.S. puts the periods in S.L.A.A. in the literature and website * Finds this frivolous * Wonder about the cost of consistent punctuation * S.L.A.A. without periods is still S.L.A.A * This item has nothing to do with the 5th Tradition * Let's do good After a period of announcements and a review of the schedule, the conference was adjourned for lunch. General Assembly Reconvenes, July 9, 2003, 1:00-2:00pm This session opened with the Serenity Prayer and readings of the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions. The quorum was met. Andrew H. served as the micro, Diana L. as the macro, and Judith W. as the back-up. Deb W. served as the record keeper, Rob H. as the timekeeper, Esta S. and Bob R. as the spiritual reminders, and Ron P. and Danette S. as the vote counters. Christian N., chair of the Board Nominating Committee asked for nominations from the floor. There were none. Phase II continued. 03o11/00-10: IFD: There are many of us who are in both S.L.A.A. and Co-S.L.A.A. who consider that our Co-addiction is indistinguishable from out addiction, the focus is just different as it is with many special interest meetings. Therefore, please discuss: that S.L.A.A. as consider Co-S.L.A.A. as an integral part of the sex and love addiction and another part of S.L.A.A. similar to "Anorexia"; that FWS be a resource for Co-S.L.A.A. as well as a place where co-groups can accumulate resources; that at the very least, Co-S.L.A.A. be invited/a part of the Interfellowship Committee. Fifteen minutes was allotted to this issue, two minutes per person. Comments were recorded and paraphrased as follows: * These are two distinct groups * Co-S.L.A.A. members will be participating in the International Recovery Convention with their own agenda and own speakers * There is strong support of Co-S.L.A.A. * Co-S.L.A.A. is the only organization that has a cooperation statement with S.L.A.A. * Behaviors and concerns of this group is very different than that of sex and love addicts * Did not appreciate the "victim" thinking in Co-S.L.A.A. * Confused as to the definition of co-addict * Attachment referenced was the "Proposal for Changes to Co-S.L.A.A." * Co-S.L.A.A. and S.L.A.A. closely cooperative with one another in an area (CT), but getting current meetings are kept separately. This practice has made relationships of the members stronger * We encourage relationships with other addicts * Co-S.L.A.A. has no official literature or office and is trying to organize * Don't understand co-addiction * Feels like Co-S.L.A.A. is working hard to but having difficulty getting organized * It is codependent of us to fix them to become an organization independent of S.LA.A. * Partner needs to have a group and have a process of recovery * Co-S.L.A.A. was helpful when a member was struggling with an addict * Difficulty understanding Co-S.L.A.A. member and this addiction * Co-S.L.A.A. has a mission that is different and it is an issue separate from S.L.A.A. * Co-addiction happens when I am affected by someone else's acting out, it is separate from S.L.A.A. 03o12/01-01: IFD: Each committee have a board liaison to report any progress to. There was 10 minutes allotted for this issue. The comments are recorded and paraphrased as follows. * This is current practice * Appreciation of liaison * Having an authoritative liaison would not be helpful * BOT liaisons should be clearly identified as would be their roles * Wonder if the originator knows this is practice * This was originated because a certain committee wanted the BOT member to call, organize, facilitate the work of the conference * The originator of the IFD is not a regular member * A BOT liaison was helpful to conducting business and guiding members through the business process * This is not a good use of conference's time- what is in the greater good of the group? Made a request for conference members to not go to the microphone so that this process might end After a brief period for announcements, this session was adjourned for committee breakout sessions, spiritual loafing and getting current time, dinner, and a tour of the F.W.S. office. General Assembly, July 10, 2003, 8:30-12noon This session was opened with the Serenity Prayer, readings of the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions, and 2-minute check-ins. The quorum was met. Marcella M. served as the micro, Andrew H. served as the macro, and Deb W. served as the back-up. Rhea O. served as the record keeper, Neil M. as the timekeeper, Sarah A, as the spiritual reminder, and Irv B. and Ron P as the vote counters. After counting off, it was determined the quorum was met. 03o13/01-02: IFD: FWS office workers who are not members of fellowship should not attend ABC/M. Ten minutes was allotted for this discussion in 10 1-minute increments. The comments are recorded and paraphrased as follows: * In the CSM, By-laws on page 5, states the conference would have to approve a change in By-laws, they currently read that staff can vote and attend * The staff is on front lines with addict who still suffers and do more 12 step work than many of us do * They need to be here to get information * This is a practical matter, how would we run the conference without them * A staff member was insulted - she is an addict and cares about program, some staff members aren't in program, yet care very strongly * They should only attend if they attend a meeting or are a delegate * A staff member, who is not program member, found it invaluable to come to ABM to learn about addicts * In Concept 11 of A.A. Traditions, it is indicated that you must have proper authority where there is responsibility * We are blessed to have this staff work with us, we shouldn't judge their attendance to be judged on basis of this complaint * By-laws indicate anyone who contributes can participate * This may seem ridiculous, but there is integrity in allowing this item to be on agenda * It is good to discuss it anyway because we have information that the maker may not have 03o14/01-05: Motion: Approve the [Crosstalk, Feedback, & Triggering Language] pamphlet. The CLC tables this motion until the next ABM with the comment that it is not ready. The Cross talk and Feed-back portions of the pamphlet are revised and in use by office. Participants can feel free to distribute the feedback form in order to help committee revise it. 03o15/01-06: Motion: Approve the [After-Slip Worksheet] pamphlet. Committee statements included: * Version 14a just was just handed out. The circled areas are new changes. * The word "requires" was changed on front page * Things like punctuation doesn't belong to CLC, it belongs to the Board Literature Committee * The changes on front page had message of hope added, rewording to remove word "requires" * Discussion on this motion was held with three pros and three cons. The comments are recorded and paraphrased as follows: * This pamphlet carries message to the suffering addict, it has been field tested in 5 cities, the feedback is that document is helpful and that it is too self-help oriented and not enough step oriented, has been used in groups for 7 years, has been on ABM agenda for 3 years, has been through heavy revisions in committee, it's time to approve this document * There is no negative responses on this pamphlet from Tampa Bay area in 2 years, area is starved for literature, it is a choice to use this document, if you don't like it, don't use it; it would be irresponsible to not approve this * I am a newcomer who watched my brother die of this disease, this pamphlet gives hope, the document isn't perfect, but it might save someone's life, by producing something we are carrying message; I don't think we can produce a perfect document but we produce a tool that brings hope and helps us stay sober, we can always revise the document later * My groups want literature and asked me to approve literature, it is better than what we have, I tried to make revisions that I thought were minor, but word "requires" has been removed, however the language is often too strident, the steps are suggestions, references 2nd paragraph of version 14a where "we saw a problem and made a plan of action"; if I had been told what to do, I would have rebelled and failed in program; it says to make plan this very day, but that could leave people to their own devices without benefit of consult with sponsor * Grammatically, this piece is absolutely acceptable, the presentation is very acceptable; written to help S.L.A.A. recover from slip, however, the primary purpose is to carry message, the worksheet is a self help tool that has been helpful to addicts, the CLC has tried to overlay 12 Steps, Higher Power onto this worksheet, but a leopard cannot change it's spots and it doesn't have true message of S.L.A.A., uses "you" statements instead of "we" statements, doesn't reflect our collective experience; doesn't reflect what "we know," it reflects what "you should do" * 5th tradition is to carry it's message, what message are we carrying with this document; yes, people will gain benefit from this document, but there are other ways to gain benefit After the discussion a first vote was called, 35/9/3. Minority opinion was heard. A second vote was called, 25/16/6. The motion passed. Group conscience was challenged. An up-down vote was taken about whether this was group conscience Yes=29, No=17. The motion passed. At this point in the process, the BOT requested a vote from the conference floor about whether the conference desired time to discuss the current functioning of the CLC. After several clarifications, the BOT made a motion: To add an Issue for Discussion to address the circumstances surrounding the Conference Literature Committee. A first vote was taken, 34/6/8. Minority opinion was heard. A second vote was taken, 31/11/4. The motion passes. Twenty minutes was allotted for the discussion in 1-minute increments. Comments are reported and paraphrased as follows: * Personalities are getting in the way of personalities on CLC, pink elephant in room, already done group inventory * Board liaison experienced dysfunctionality; name calling and poor behavior in meetings of CLC * I am unaware of literature situation until Intergroup said help us, seeking perfection paralyzes us from doing good * CCC and Board got a letter asking them to fix the problem, we can't; we agree that there is a problem, even if we don't agree what it is * Apologies for participation in ugliness at yesterday's meeting; working the 4th step around this issue * Internal mechanisms within the CLC haven't solved problem; this is affecting our common welfare * Personalities are a major problem on CLC * I was surprised about the meeting. There are disputes because of passion. Hope people would resolve personal problems using the Steps * Attraction of CLC has been diminished because of public tension on CLC; what is our process for approving literature * Polarization on CLC resulting in personal conflicts, losing literature because of this, can we come up with new process that gets us around/above the problem * The Board may use this item for discussion as a way to not honor the vote/motion passing (because the vote is not 2/3 binding) * Was concerned about how the Board voted on motion to approve worksheet * I wanted to have this discussion to understand what the problem is, we clearly need a new process; I haven't wanted to be on CLC because of their complications * I had been telling people how functional this conference is until I went to CLC meeting; I saw accusations and name calling and people being reactionary * The CLC can't seem to get literature out * I had short outburst at meeting and talked to my sponsor, I don't know what to do about this now * I was a reactionary, I am sorry for my behavior; we have had over managing on committee, this problem didn't happen until certain people joined the committee * I am concerned about the role of politics in the conference; concerned about people talking about "strategizing" to get things done * Per the traditions, the CLC is responsible to fellowship, there is no method of accountability * In Germany, no couple should be member of same group, perhaps this should be the same within a committee * I've had my own level of willfulness in my life and appreciate honesty in group * On CLC, there are a lot of talented people who work in different ways * Sparks are natural when working together, but some behavior is not; format read before meeting There was a short break. Afterwards, Phase II continued. 03o17/01-10: IFD: Recognizing that identification of a higher power is a sensitive issue for many, how can we best serve the needs of the addict who still suffers and has great resistance to the word "God?" Use "Higher Power," "God/Higher Power," "God" interchangeably and equitably in our literature? Create literature geared specifically to the agnostic or atheist? Other suggestions? Twenty minutes was allotted for discussion on this item in 1-minute increments. Comments are recorded and paraphrased as follows: * The Conference Steps and Traditions Committee supports discussion * In my first meeting I was concerned about "God," possible cult issues; would hurt us to get rid of God/Higher Power language * We say we'll have a spiritual experience, NEI would be upset if we took "God" out of our literature * Some of our problems have to do with not accessing Higher Power * What do other programs do?; the "We Agnostics" chapter of A.A. already exists; perhaps we can make a note in the Preamble * God concept was difficult for me; another group still uses God in its literature even though people don't all say it * No one is saying we should remove God concept from literature, should we change wording * Don't feel that any change is necessary, we already use lot of different phrasing * God terminology made me angry when I was new but it helped me to take a look at where my issues came from * This is a diversity issue, that committee should address this * There is a literature piece "A Higher Power for You" in process, needs participants * We are a spiritual program, not a religious program * Bill Wilson used God because of other issues * I found my HP in program no matter how it was written * Important to discuss this, I'm agnostic, I use HP and God as we understood God * I'm afraid God will be taken out of our Fellowship altogether * I don't think we need a change * In our literature, Higher Power is sometimes capitalized and sometimes not, grace is sometimes capitalized * Disclaimer that many terminologies are used in the S.L.A.A. Basic Text * I'm intelligent enough to read between the lines, that my spirituality can be whatever I want it to be; hope others are, too 03o18/01-11 Motion revised by maker: During the interim and until the CCC and the Conference bring about changes that eliminate the many year backlog of motions and discussion items, let us create a fast-track for literature projects finalized and approved by the CLC so they will be addresses by the next conference. Discussion on this item was delayed to print out copies of the revised motion for the participants. 03o19/02-01 Motion: Add "Thy will, not mine, be done." to the end of the Serenity Prayer, wherever it appears in conference approved literature, if it does not already exist. * Make literature consistent, either add it or not * Against this addition, offensive to Christians * Appears in literature inconsistently, make it consistent * Colorado gives an emphatic "no," objection to "Thy," adds an obstacle to newcomers, violation of the 6th tradition with an affiliation to Christianity * DVI 5-4 for the motion * Group autonomy, let's not take away flexibility A first vote was taken, 9/29/9. Minority opinion was heard and a second vote was taken, 13/29/5. The motion failed. There was time for announcements and a review of the day's schedule. The assembly was adjourned for lunch. General Assembly Reconvenes, July 10, 2003 1:00-2:00pm In this session, Marcella M. served as the micro, Robin S. as the macro, and Deb W. as the back-up. Andrew H. served as the record keeper, Neil M. as the timekeeper, Sarah A. as the spiritual reminder, and Ron P. and Irv B. as the vote counters. Phase II continued. 3o18/01-11 Original Motion: Create a fast-track for a completed literature title to be addressed by the Conference. After the CLC produces its final draft, let them submit it to the CCC for placement at the top of the next ABM agenda, or for decision-making between ABMs. Revised Motion: During the interim and until the CCC and the Conference bring about changes that eliminate the many year backlog of motions and discussion items, let us create a fast-track for literature projects finalized and approved by the CLC so they will be addresses by the next conference. There was a motion to amend the newly revised motion: Address motions to approve literature before other BMIS items at the next ABM. There was a suggestion for a friendly amendment to the motion to read: Address motions to approve literature finalized and approved by the CLC before other BMIS items starting at the next ABM. Discussion was held about this motion after which, the motion to amend was withdrawn. Another amended motion was made: Motion to Amend: Until the BMIS is completed on a yearly basis, the Conference shall address motions to approve literature that is finalized and approved by the CLC before other BMIS items starting at the next ABM. Discussion was held on this amended motion. A first vote was taken, 9/23/14. There was no minority opinion. The motion failed. The facilitator returned to the revised motion: During the interim and until the CCC and the Conference bring about changes that eliminate the many year backlog of motions and discussion items, let us create a fast-track for literature projects finalized and approved by the CLC so they will be addresses by the next conference. Comments were heard from the referred committees and discussion held. A first vote was taken, 15/19/12. Minority opinion was heard and a second vote was taken, 23/15/9. The facilitator ended this session due to the lack of time and stated the motion would be tabled for this year and sent back to the referred committees. There was concern expressed about ending the process hear. The facilitator allotted more time to hear the new minority opinion. A third vote was taken, 16/21/9. The facilitator explained the two options: the motion fails or the motion does not reflect group conscience and does not pass. The session was ended. Announcements were made and the conference was adjourned for conference committee breakout sessions, spiritual loafing or getting current, and dinner. General Assembly Reconvenes, July 10, 2003 7:00-8:00pm In this session, the conference recognized the service of the outgoing BOT members, Rob K., Andrew H., and Roger R. The Board Nominating Committee members then facilitated a session where the BOT nominees answered questions and addressed concerns from the conference. This session was facilitated by Andrew H. as the micro, Deb W. as the macro, and Christian N. as the back-up. After this session, the conference was adjourned for the silent and live auctions. General Assembly July 11, 2003 8:30-9:30am This session was opened by the Serenity Prayer. The quorum was met. The session was facilitated by Andrew H. as the micro, Robin S. as the macro, and Marcella M. as the back-up. Rhea O. served as the record keeper. The Board Nominating Committee (BNC) distributed and collected the election ballots and left the room to count the votes. The conference discussed the use of conference calls, how to create a committee budget, the importance of committee rosters, and adopt-a-committee information. It was announced that the ABM fundraising events raised $5,354.00 for S.L.A.A. When the BNC returned to the room, they made the announcement as to the results of the election: John Cosby, Roger Rasmusen, and Robin Schiessl were elected to the Board of Trustees. The conference acknowledged and welcomed the new BOT members. They also acknowledged the volunteers and staff for their assistance. The session was closed with a moment of silence and the Serenity Prayer. The session adjourned for committee breakout meetings and lunch. General Assembly Reconvenes, July 11, 2003, 1-2:15pm This session was facilitated by Diana L. (co-chair of the CCC) as the micro and Marcella M. (chair of the BOT) as the macro. Deb W. served as the record keeper. Final committee reports were made. They are as follows: * BOT: Marcella reminded the conference of the state of transition of the BOT, this year as the final piece of the of the Executive Service Corps meetings. The BOT will be more business oriented and read the new BOT meeting opening statement. The BOT will be reaching out more to the fellowship for help on ad hoc committees, insuring financial stability, and trying to grow the organization. There was an announcement that the 2004 ABC/M will take place at the Holiday Inn in Dedham, MA on July 20-23 or August 3-6. There was a request to have the new BOT business meeting opening statement in the minutes. It reads: "Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous is a Twelve Step, Twelve Tradition oriented fellowship based on the model pioneered by Alcoholics Anonymous. The only qualification for S.L.A.A. membership is a desire to stop living out a pattern of sex and love addiction. S.L.A.A. is supported entirely through contributions of its membership, and is free to all who need it. The BOT is a business meeting. We are the business arm of our recovery organization. Respecting the 2nd Tradition, we need to put individual feelings aside when we work for the BOT and focus on what serves the Fellowship best. This is a job. We are trusted servants. We abuse that trust when we do not act professionally in discharging the business of the Fellowship." * F.W.S.: There was a request for conference committees to finish and submit their budgets by Aug. 1, 2003 as well as copies of their committee rosters. There was a reminder to all that the F.W.S. office will be closed on Monday, July 14. * Conference Literature Committee: This committee did not elect a chair. The first meeting is set for Aug. 17 at 7pm Pacific time. They have made a $2500 budget request. * Conference By-Laws Committee: Cristina C. reported that this committee has not yet elected a chair, did not determine a budget, and had no meeting date set. Cristina stated she will be initiating the first call. * Conference Internet Committee: Tom K. was elected the chair. The committee had five members and asked for $400 for their budget. The first meeting date was not set. Projects include: development of an internet web toolkit and the development of a website to host conference committee web pages. * Conference Anorexia Committee: Ron G. was elected the chair. This committee has 12 members and made a $750 budget request. The first meeting will be held on Aug. 3, 6:30pm Pacific. Projects include: compiling questionnaire results, starting an online anorexia meeting on Friday nights, and writing literature. * Prison Outreach Committee: Danielle P., Kenn C., and Dave McM. are the co-chairs. They asked for $1206 for their budget. The first meeting is set for Aug. 1, 5pm Pacific. Projects included: starter kits on packet for pen pals, Intergroup outreach, and outreach to diverse populations in prison. * Interfellowship Committee: Irv B. was elected the chair. There are seven members of this committee. No budget request or first meeting date was made. Projects include: to host the IF Forum and get executive directors to meet for additional information. * Journal Committee: Bob R. was elected the chair. He requested the names of current Journal reps. There was a $600 budget request made. Projects include: to brainstorm/promote better use of the Journal, explore themes of editions, and promote new authors by asking authors to write on a particular topic. * Members Retention Committee: Dianne S. , Kim S. and Cristina will coordinate the first call and later determine their budget. They asked for assistance in their current projects, e.g., The Step Chips. * Diversity Committee- Sarah A. and Karen O. are the co-chairs for this committee. They have asked for $1100 in their budget. The first call is set for Aug 8 time? Projects include: compiling diverse formats of meetings, outreach carrying the message to special populations, e.g., people of color, the deaf community, battered women and doing this work with help from the speaker bureau. * Conference Public Information Committee: Bill M. was elected the committee chair. They set a budget for $700 and the first meeting for Aug 3, 11am Eastern. Projects include: assist BPiC, recovery clinic for outreach in helping groups with public information and worldwide fellowship, support and educate membership as to the 12 recommended guidelines, develop a screening process stressing anonymity on speaker bureau, and encouraging members to fill out the speaker bureau form. * Healthy Relationships Committee: No chair was elected. A budget was set for $900 and the first meeting for Aug. 10, 6pm Pacific. Projects include: revamping the mission statement to include Step-based, God-centered language used to maintain healthy relationships with God, ourselves, and others, a pamphlet subcommittee, and developing a code of conduct in meetings. * Conference Steps and Traditions Committee: Daniel C. was elected the chair. The budget request of $750 was made the first meeting set for Aug. 9, 6am Pacific. Projects include: working with literature committee to deal with writing of the Steps and Traditions. * Conference Charter Committee: Diana L. and Rhea O. were elected co-chairs. The first meeting was set for Aug 3, 10am Eastern. A budget request of $2500 was made. * Conference Finance Committee: Gaelen S.R. will initiate the first call. No budget was requested. The committee has seven members. Intergroup Communication Committee: Danette S. and Jack S. were elected co-chairs. The committee has eight members. The committee mad a budget request of $380. The first meeting will be Aug 16, 8pm Eastern. The co-chair read its mission statement. Once the committee reports were completed, there was a motion made: Motion: A confirmation of all Conference Committees, including Conference Service, Conference Sponsorship, and Conference Relationship to FWS/Trustees. The quorum was met. A vote was taken, 42/0/1. The committees were confirmed. Additional gratitude was shared, last announcements were made, and a request for evaluations to be completed. The conference closed with a moment of silence and the Serenity Prayer. Holiday Inn, Dedham/Boston, MA S.L.A.A. 2003 ABM/C July 8-11, 2003 Page 1 of 18